Do People Still Believe In Filial Piety?

 

BY

LEONG WEN XYUAN

Deputy Editor

Hype Issue #84

Published on:
Jan 21
2026

 

LEONG WEN XYUAN investigates how social media and generational shifts are reshaping the understanding of filial piety in Singapore.

 

Filial Piety has long been a defining value in many households. Traditionally, it emphasised the need for obedience, respecting elders, and the expectation that children will repay their parents’ sacrifices through academic success, financial support, and emotional availability.

In recent years, however, these expectations have increasingly been questioned, with Western liberal values such as self-determination, prioritising mental well-being, and establishing boundaries circulating on social media platforms — values that have not traditionally been foregrounded in many Asian family settings, where obedience and collective responsibility are often emphasised. 

In a society where almost every child owns a device, these values tend to spread like wildfire online and are prone to shaping how younger Singaporeans think about the world around them. 

Rather than signalling a rejection of filial piety, this shift reflects a broader generational redirection of what care, responsibility, and respect towards family look like today. 

Different Generations, Different Understandings

“Filial piety often means different things to different generations,” said Professor Chang-Yau Hoon, the Director of International Office and Professor at the College of Interdisciplinary and Experiential Learning at the Singapore University of Social Sciences (SUSS).

“For older generations, filial piety was largely about obedience, sacrifice, and duty,” he explained. “Children were expected to listen, comply, and eventually provide material support to repay the sacrifices their parents had made for them.”

Younger generations, by contrast, tend to emphasise more on emotional care and personal agency. For younger Singaporeans today, Professor Hoon mentioned how filial piety is no longer centred on unquestioned obedience, but instead stresses negotiation, personal boundaries, and mutual respect, reflecting a shift in how the value is understood rather than its disappearance.

This reinterpretation has been largely influenced by values spread on social media. A recent study by RSIS International on Gen Z students found that time spent on social media significantly influences personal values. The same study attributed this to exposure to diverse perspectives beyond their recent environment, including conversations around independence and mental health that are prominent in Western liberal discourse on platforms like TikTok and Instagram. Over time, repeated exposure to these ideas has gradually influenced how younger Singaporeans understand their roles within the family.

Growing Up With Traditional Expectations

Valent Tan, a 22-year-old Gen Z Singaporean, described being raised with clear expectations around respect for elders. “The most important thing was respect and not talking back to your parents and elders,” she recounted. “I was also taught to have good grades and good behaviour, and to not cause any trouble outside of home.”

Pet Sitter

Valent showcasing products from her small business (Photo Credit: Valent Tan)

For her, filial piety still centres around care and respect for her parents, but her pursuit of independence reflects a generational shift. She began working part-time at 16 and now balances full-time studies with freelance content creation, livestreaming, and running a small business. These pursuits are driven by her desire to independently support herself and her family financially.

“I started my own small business running The Crafted Parfum, but at the same time, my family members are worried since I have school and my small business to juggle,” she shared. 

Growing up with strong expectations around responsibility and self-reliance, she learnt early on that being a good daughter meant not depending too heavily on her parents. That mindset continues to shape her desire to be financially independent, reflecting an ingrained sense of duty to be capable and eventually give back to her parents.

Despite her parents’ concerns about the workload, Valent considers these commitments as steps towards long-term financial stability.

“As much as I am doing this for myself, to understand what I want to pursue in the future and hustle for some money to spend, I am also doing this for my family, to give back to them,” she explained.

Negotiating Independence and Responsibility

While younger Singaporeans are negotiating independence alongside traditional expectations, millennials face a different form of tension. Rather than rejecting responsibility, they are balancing what they were taught with the practical realities of adulthood today.

Chelsea Wong, 30, grew up with traditional ideas of filial responsibility but now finds herself navigating changing expectations. 

“I was taught to listen to my parents and not talk back,” she says, “and to take care of them when they are older.”

She adds that while she respects her parents, there have been moments of tension as she negotiates her own opinions and decisions. She noted that the friction between them was not about defiance, but rather striking a balance between respecting her parents and asserting her own perspective. “I don’t think it makes sense or [that] it works anymore in this day and age to teach a child not to talk back and just listen,” she said. 

Instead, she sees filial piety as something that should be discussed within each family, rather than strictly defined. “I don’t think there’s a set way of how it should look. It really depends on what works between the parent and child. As long as both sides feel happy with it, then it works for them,” Chelsea shared.

Photo Credit: Freepik


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Why Filial Piety Feels Heavier Today

This act of balancing respect, independence, and family expectations contributes to why filial piety can feel heavier for younger generations. Professor Hoon noted that broader structural pressures such as the rise in cost of living, job insecurity, and long working hours, also increase the emotional weight, as time and energy become increasingly limited.

“Filial piety feels heavier today because it now sits at the intersection of love, obligation, and self-preservation,” he explained. “Guilt emerges when care is framed as something owed or obligated rather than chosen.” 

When young adults start to feel obliged to give back instead of giving back from the bottom of their heart, they may struggle to gauge whether they are doing ‘enough’. This dynamic may transform filial piety from an expression of affection into a source of persistent emotional pressure, where care becomes more of a measure of moral and material worth rather than an expression of affection. 

Professor Hoon added that filial piety can become entangled with financial responsibility. This reframes care as a transactional exchange focused on who pays, provides, or sacrifices, rather than something relational, voluntary, and rooted in love.

This discomfort is developed by cultural norms that discourage open discussion of resentment or exhaustion within families. “Expressing exhaustion can feel like moral failure, ingratitude, or betrayal,” he said, leading many to remain silent instead.

Redefinition Rather Than Decline

Despite growing concerns that filial piety is diminishing in today’s day and age, many view it as evolving rather than disappearing.

“Filial piety would no longer be measured by sacrifice alone, but by mutual respect, emotional understanding, and shared responsibility,” Professor Hoon says, “a healthier filial piety would be reciprocal rather than one-directional,” reflecting a shift in how these expectations are understood today and emphasising the importance of reciprocity. 

Chelsea echoes this more flexible approach, noting that filial piety is shaped by what each family agrees on, as long as both parents and children are content.

As Western liberal ideas continue to circulate through digital platforms, the challenge for many Singaporean families may not lie in choosing between tradition and modernity, but in balancing evolving values with meaningful family bonds. Ultimately, the debate around filial piety in Singapore is not about its decline, but about how it is being reshaped to navigate changing values while trying to preserve care and respect.